a rite of passage completed

i officially turn 21 today....sigh. it's a paradoxical feeling. on the one hand i revel in the new found legal-binding franchise and attainment of fully-fledged citizenry. on the other hand, i mourn the passing of yet more youthful years of carefree ambivalence. with greater power comes greater responsibility. for far too long have i languished in the nadir of underachievement and the loss of self-belief. it is far overdue that i have to face up with the responsibility and accountability to my state of being in the future by getting my act together now. as age passes by, the more overated a birthday feels. the greatest gift i could ever receive from my parents, are certainly not the digital camera or a supplementary card i received, nor the MD player the year before, but rather what i told them when they asked what i wanted - the recognition and acceptance of me as an individual, independent in my thoughts and direction in life, and not a biological product that by default subjects me to their perception of how i should become as a person. of course i do appreciate that most of these are attributed to their concern me, and that at many a time my actions hardly justifies my age. but is maturity simply making your bed and tidying your room everyday? maybe. but emotionally and intellectually, i do consider myself not below the standard of an average adult. there are after all many grown man or women who fail to take responsibility in their own life or even that of their kids even at the age of 40. it is perhaps right to say that maturity has hardly anything to do with one's biological clock but rather the mentality. with that in mind, it is time that i start shaping my own destiny in a responisble way.
happy birthday.