finishing combo

yes! i finally paid my dues, serving 2 consecutive confinements and a weekend duty (although i still stand firm on my belief that there was no breach of the social or in this case the military contract....fuck rosseau and his punity bullshit), was i morally chastised by the 2 confinements? i dun think so. am i deterred from challenging the system? hell no. am i just had the great pleasure to receive news that tham's trying every possible means to carpet search my every flouting of the 'martial law', BRING IT ON MOFO! if there's anything useful out of the whole shebang, it's that it definitely gonna make me look over my shoulder more often. now perhaps i can now claim political persecution from an evil military regime and seek asylum in some patronising 1st world country....anyway the weekend was pretty happening. cycled in the rain to collect the pizza, sang karaoke with fellow (lao jiao too) confinees qinlong and darren chua. the more the hun sens and the musharafs of bravo coy want us feel bad about getting our weekends burnt, the more we should enjoy it in the most hendonistic way....haha i mean karaoke in the bunk? dun think it can get better than that. ok yeah, did i forget to mention that it too was my 1st orderly duty? it was with darren as COS too, u get 2 cjc slackers on duty, u get a 1 x hibernating coy. and for some inexplicable or perhaps unmentionable reasons, harley decided not to book out and mug for sats with his buddy and then fly into his usual pseudo-pms moodswings again just becos his buddy 'LIED' about paying for the dvd player and then telling him (harley) ' no lah, just joking'...' U promised me that you won't lie anymore.' .....'how can u lie to your buddy?' *shruggzzzzz* if not for the fact that i know both of them in person, i would most definitely believe that they 'have of penchant for what one already has (down south) *wink* ' ...i really can't overestimate how traumatised darren would feel....

inter milan 1 - 5 arsenal

HAHA!!~ YES! the sleep deprivation was well justified! poetic justice as well if u could recall andy van der meyde and his condescending goal celebration antics during the leg at highbury. guess this late late reversal of fortunes with respect to knockout stage qualification can only further add on to my sense of affinity to the gunners. 1999, the year when i officially became a gunner. i loved perennial runners-up. no one else, but the runners-up themselves can comprehend that bittersweet feeling. the lamentation on being only inches away from achieving eternity only to settle for mortality. sure most of us probably know that uraguay won the first two world cups, but do you know the runners-up respectively? in 1999, i tasted that bittersweet feeling. i was a runners-up. arsenal finished runners-up too that season when manchester united won the treble (argggh) arsenal has become more than just a team, it's THE team. my source of inspiration, that perseverance. that defiance to fate. no one was born to be champion, its self-made.
'Victoria Concordia Crescit'.
Translation: 'Victory grows out of harmony.'"

love me for a reason (let the reason be love)

love actually? not beyond reasonable doubt. is love the union of two individuals regardless of how culturally different they may be? is love a unilateral provision of material pleasures even at the expense of one's insolvency? it all started yesterday with when we went out with bingquan (better known as james these days) and his new squeeze sarah. it was supposed to be a bachelors' outing until bq decided to take his cai along. fine. we were curious to meet her anyway after seeing those glamour shots bq and her took. anyway murali and teo were late so i met them at coffee bean first. first impression...not bad looking, looks better in person. bq's getting real lucky. so from then it's the usual intro protocol shit....
bq: so how, my frens not ah beng rite
sarah: yeah, i told james that if he brought any of his ah beng frens i'm so totally gonna 'EXcuse myself politely'.
second impression: cordial....a tinge of pomposity
sarah: so what would want to do in university?
me: well i got a course in ntu but i would really want to go into smu. got rejected a few times
sarah: oh i see, i was like offered a course in smu but i din like it. i mean these days EVERYone's got a BUSINESS degree
third impression: phoney (eventually it was revealed that her 'alternative' to smu was an external degree from some hill-billy university...and her 'oh i'm like processing all my job offers so i can like find the right job'....*CRINGE*)
then murali came. and we moved to cine to get tickets for movies. and in yet another unilateral gesture, i suddenly find ourselves watching Love Actually! God, a movie that we would probably not watch or even knew existed. so anyway, we went looking for a place to eat. and eventually we settled on marche and to cut the whole darn thing short, went for pool and then for the movie. it was bq's fourth date. total expenditure = a whopping $450 ++ excluding 2 x limp bizkit tickets! i sure hope bing-guan knows what he's getting himself into. one ang-mo kangtang vs 1 x punk rock ah beng.....hmm now theoratically, if a perfect love was a union that allow couples to trade character traits from each other that were otherwise absent in oneself (or quite simple yi chang bu duan in chinese), bq and sarah might just work out to be the perfect love.......just becos they are so so so different. (isn't it great? then the ang mo kang tang can now comprehend the literal depths of profound hokkien profanities while bq can speak more decent england) Whatever it is, it is important that we, as frens do not collectively detrack bq from his pursuit for THE girl. we're not bing-guan. we'll never understand what made him go so ga-ga. so after that 3 hour multi-lateral convention regarding bq's love life throughout the wee hours in swensens, despite going in the face of societal conventions, language barriers and a very real possibility of a financial meltdown, nothing's gonna stop bq. well all we can say is, go for it then, but dun be too hopeful. xi wang yue gao, shi wang yue da. and if sarah's gonna like bq, let it be not for be for his generosity, or his bank balance, but love him for a reason, and let the reason be love.

me against the system II - showdown with poop in blueland

so that's where it ended. i went up to bunk with a bitter-sweet aftertaste - sweet about not having to be accountable to the piece of shit anymore, bitter about the ridiculous justification behind the punishment. in fact, i would have much rather that if he had the balls to tell me straight in my eye 'i gave you the 2 confinements becos i you argued with me during the ROR test, and i'm pissed, and since i am pissed i am getting back at you with whatever means at my dispense'. now THAT would have martyred me, the che guevara against oppressive military regimes (not that che wasn't militia himself) oh well, the shitty justification kinda came to that effect a little. anway, i got a call from gaya saying 'shit la....you just sabohed me...i din serve out the 2 confinements...come down to the office now' So back to the cauldron i went. There gaya showed me a msg from luo han saying "who backstabbed pc" fucking hell, firstly what i said was the truth and above-board. secondly, it said it all in front of both OC and that piece of shit. li zhi qi zhuang (with a solid case and moral justification), he wei 'backstab' (how can it be backstab then?) So there it goes, the p.o.s came, asked us to sit on the new looted sofa from the interview room in a pseudo-informal manner like he always do.

(p.o.s sits opposite me and gaya)
p.o.s: Ok, i would like to talk to you and explain about that just now.'
me: Sir, i dun think that there's much to say. I will serve out the confinements, and there're really isn't a need for you to try to convince me becos nothing you say can convince me that the punishment was justified.
p.o.s: I just want to say what i feel. So now i cannot talk to you and ask you to listen to me?
me: sure you can, i'm listening.
p.o.s: Ok, gaya, did you actually go and sign the confinements? (to me) and by the way it's only 2 and not 3.
gaya:(looks sheepishly on the floor) no, i din serve.
p.o.s: see, i asked harley not to let him serve after that. becos gaya talk like that to everyone even me, even commander armceg he also like that. right gaya
gaya: yes.
p.o.s: Ok, thank you gaya, you can go now.
Me: So is gaya going to serve his confinements now that i mentioned it in front of OC?"
p.o.s: No, he won't serve
Me (relieved): That's good.
(gaya leaves)
p.o.s: I dunno why you have to say those things in front of the OC, it's like you are trying to say th....
Me: What i said was the truth, i had nothing to hide.
p.o.s: ah see see! everytime i talk you must interupt, can you give me a chance to say what i have to say?
me: sure.
p.o.s: Ok, the way to say the interview thing. first i ask you did i ask you to forge the signatures, no right the way you say it's like you are suggesting to OC that i did not do my work and ask...
Me: IN NO WAY did i try to mislead OC into thinking that you instigated me into forging the signature. all i wanted to do was to talk about the issue at hand which was the punishments. therefore i used the fact that i processed all the booklets before friday to illustrate the fact that i met the deadline.
p.o.s: CAN YOU LET ME CONTINUE?
(me upturned palm signaling by all means carry on, piece of turd)
p.o.s: Ok, then for the A.I, lesson plans, and evacuation routes, ok lah, i tot that all the format was already in the stand-alone so all you needed to do was to change the dates. Since you type quite fast, i personally admit i cannot type fast, so i ask you to do it. I mean if you think just typing it out is like planning the set up and doing the AI then i got nothing to say.
(FUCKING LIAR)
Me: Sir, it was more than that. i remember there was this timor-barat campfire thingy for the ncc. You actually asked me to do up the A.I based on the draft email sent to OC.
p.o.s: got meh, i tot OC done that
Me: No, i was very sure i did that becos you even asked me to think of the risks for the SRM.
p.o.s tries to worm out
p.o.s: It's called RAWR now.
Me: Ok, RAWR whatever (not wanting to be diverted away) So in that case, if something happens in that camp, who would be responsible? me or you? So is that not true? that's why i am not convinced that my past performance was so bad as to justify the 2 confinements.
p.o.s: it happen a lot of time already. remember the maps i ask you to photostat? did wai peng tell you that u left the maps in the ops rm?
Me:Yes. the shredder was down so i shredded it by hand.
p.o.s: that's good, u took the initiative. but did u know that u left a stack behind. that's why when zhisheng (the 2 headed snake) told me that u did not do up the tasks properly that was (the last straw) when i tot that i must punish you. i cannot read yr mind lah, i dunno what's going on in your head. i dun like your working attitude so before barge i asked chin guan to come down and help me.
Me: Yes, i believe that's the best solution for you and for me.
p.o.s: what solution, that was already decided, i told csm already.
Me: whatever.
p.o.s: somemore it's like you are suggesting to OC that i didn't do a lot of.
Me: All i wanted to do was to deal with the 2 confinement issues. In no way did i suggest to OC or insinuate about your incapibility as a platoon commander or your inability to manage the platoon.
p.o.s stunned
p.o.s: you are very good at language, whatever you say i cannot out talk you. but i just want to tell you what i feel.
(me think : that's not the point you fucking moron, it's right down to the fact that your justifications sucked)
Me: Sir, frankly there's no need for you to talk about all these to convince me
p.o.s: I'm not trying to convince you....
Me: yes, whatever, anyway the point is i will go on to serve my 2 confinements. but nothing you say can convince me that the punishment was justified. So may i take my leave now sir?
p.o.s: yes.
(me fucked off)

Argument with superior - real reason for 2 confinements
Unsatisfactory work - 'official reason' for 2 confinements
Seeing the smug face of the piece of shit wiped off and humbled - PRICELESS

Somethings in life are priceless, for everything else, there's the fucking holy book.

me against the system

perhaps i should have been less apathetic towards learning new stuff. it's been more than a week since i got this blog started and still i have no idea as to how am i supposed to get it started. do i need to know html or wat? somebody help pls! anyway many things happened during this unchronicled week, or should i say pre-chronicled. first it was the 2 confinements which i am due to serve in less than 24 hours from now. i remember reading about people who were put on the death row for years and were then acquitted eventually, rather than feeling bitter towards this miscarriage of justice, somehow they felt kinda glad. i can't really say if that's how i feel now. after all, i'm still gonna serve the 2 fucking confinements. if there's anything that's i am gonna learn from this episode, its definitely gonna make me look over my back more often. showdown started like this 2 days ago:

(setting OC office. OC sits on his seat, the piece of shit (p.o.s) sits opposite OC carrying a smirk )

Me: Sir, so what's your decision regarding the punishment
OC: Ok... the punishment....will stand
Me: I see sir, I have already signed on the holy book, but i really need to know the real reason behind the confinements. While i will serve out the punishment, i still feel that the reasons for the punishment cannot be justified. Firstly regarding the interview booklets. I was very sure that I met the deadline on friday cos most of almond platoon were on off the day before. and i forged the signatures and processed the booklets on thurs. i then submitted it to zhisheng. there was only 1 booklet that was eventually rejected, and it belonged to LCP Desmond Lim for the sole reason that the interval between one of the interviews exceeded that of (the stipulated) 2 months. and i then processed the booklet and returned it to zhisheng. so therefore how i do not agree that that was an example of irresponisbility.
(p.o.s chips in)
p.o.s: I didn't ask you to forg...
Me: Sir, if you would allow me to continue. secondly, regarding the statements (for the 2 diskettes) incident. i completed the statement and had it saved in the stand-alone. only after that did zhisheng (again!) tell me that the serial no of the diskettes had to be included in the statements as well. he said he would get the serial no from S2 side and then get back to me. so i waited for a while in the office and went up to bunk after that. i acknowledge that it was my fault that i forgot to call up zhisheng after that, but neither did he call me. in anycase, i did eventually recover the 2 unaccounted diskettes so the statements weren't needed. so sir, do you seriously think that these 2 minor mistakes warrants 2 confinements?
OC: Ok... you see ah. I ask you, when you work for your superiors or your bosses in the future, are you supposed to meet their standards or are they supposed to meet your standards?
Me: The superior's standards sir.
OC: Superior's standards right? Ok, so you have to understand that different PCs have different standards. Maybe what you did last time was acceptable to Cpt Myron but now it's 2LT (piece of shit). I remember last time you also have problems with Cpt Myron about the standards of work right?
Me: Yes, that was during Claymore.
OC: I know, i was there. but i din want to interfere becos that was between you and the PC so as an OC, i may not understand the situation so i did not interfere. so ah, you see this problem may have started then already. somemore remember that time you and qinglong were playing a fool outside the store.
Me: (Smiling) haha, yes, we were....just ji xiao-ing.
OC: Yes, to me i may be able to know that you all were only playing that's why i din punish you all. But what if like commander saw that? would he think that u all are only ji xiao-ing? he would think that you all are ill-disciplined right?
Me: Yes... (puzzled by its relevance to the issue at hand)
p.o.s: Yes, this is also not the first time you have given me unacceptable standards. it happen so many times until when zhisheng told me about it, that was when i decided that i had to punish you.
Me: So sir, can you give me an example of such an incident?
p.o.s: It happened so many times, i cannot point out everyon...
Me: Anyone sir, i need to know.
p.o.s: Ok, you want me to say, like the time.......so many times, i cannot remember all....ok, like the time i asked you to come down and you were in the bunk sleeping, i thought it would be ugly if i went to your bunk and get u up.
Me: So sir, to conclude, the punishment was given on the basis of my past performance which you felt was unsatisfactory rather than on the 2 accounts pertaining to the interview booklets and the statements.
p.o.s: Ok, i think it might be my fault that i did not make it clear the last time, but yes it was because of your past performance.
(me thinking: inconsistent case you bastard)
Me to OC:: Ok, so now that it is clear that i signed becos of my past mistakes. but sir, even on the account of past performance, i still dun think that the punishment was justified. With all due respect to 2lt (piece of shit) sir, tasks such as like the doing up of Admin Instructions, Lesson plans and even Safety Risk Management are supposed to be done up by the PC himself, but at times i was the one who did those up. And for those previous tasks, i am pretty sure that i met all the deadlines which is why i still do not believe that my past performance was so bad as to warrant 2 confinements.
(p.o.s face changes....no more fucking smirk)
OC: Ok ah....2lt (p.o.s) is still new, so somethings you have to help him out. cannot be he one person do everything right. I know sometimes when a punishment is given the person who receives the punishment will never understand where he's wrong. Like for eg, you and qinlong that incident, if commander did see it, and gave you all punishments, you all will definitely think that you all only ji xiao-xiao nothing wrong wat. but to him, commander will think that you all are ill-disciplined right or not?
Me: Yes sir, which is why when i was given 2 confinements not long ago, i had nothing to say or argue for that becos i admitted that i was in the wrong (and one of the counts of that confinements albeit stupidity on my part, was becos that fucking piece of shit was in such a hurry for me to go down that i din even have time to find my socks and wear them...). So sir, one more reason apart that i wanted to clarify the reason behind the punishment was because, pardon me for being honest, 2lt (piece of shit) sir has a reputation in almond platoon for giving confinements indiscriminately. For eg, last time (Mur)Gaya was given 3 confinements (actually 2, my mistake) by him for no apparant reason. That's why i wanted to seek clarification. (p.o.s face stiffens)
Me: Ok, thank you very much sir (OC), i really appreciate your help ( i really do. he went beyond his duties to help me. it's just that like all illogical SAF traditions, superior commanders find it a taboo to overwrite punishments given by junior commanders regardless of logic) In addition sir, i believe since i may have a problem meeting the standards set by 2lt (piece of shit) sir, i think that it is best that i step down as his runner, so sir, may i change my vocation then?
(p.o.s changes face again, talks in a matter-of-factly tone, dropping the emotive rhetoric, as though he scored a golden goal)
p.o.s: i tot i told csm already, that chin guan will take over from you.
Me (elated): Really, great, then that would be the best outcome. Thank you very much sir (OC).
(me goes out of the office)