DotA 's Meaning of Life

and so there it was, another weekend spent defending the frozen throne. at risk of sounding misogynistic, here's a public apology to my dear dictators who introduced me to the dark arts of DotA last summer....your senior here disgraced the lineage of dictators , the entire male gender by getting owned by 2 girls...3 games in a row and ended up selling me, my team mate, and another hapless fren (who cluelessly became the stakes of the grudge match) into slavery.
owning has taken a whole new meaning since...

well anyway, here's how it went: i was using Pudge for the first 2 games and farmed for a Heart of Tarresque and 2 cranium bashers while danny (my teammate) used Bone Clinkz. (danny the xxx, with bone...anyone who knows his nickname should appreciate the irony *hint: jet lee's 2nd last action flick*)

perhaps i overestimated my ability in hooking and always ended up wasting my hook. nair mind. But what was even worse was that i happily went 1 v 1 with the other heroes (slayer and atropos) thinking that i can hook, dismember and rot them in one combo. there was only one problem, i never knew that Black King Bar existed until the end of the game.... and so even for those few time that i succeeded in hooking, and i enthusiastically turned on rot only to end up hurting and killing myself! that has to be the most fucking stupid mistake in the history of DotA ever!

The fourth game was a little better when i reverted back to using a ranged hero Drow and danny used rikimaru. I farmed for an Eye of Skadi. I was told by the guy at the lan shop (whose advice was arguably the critical factor that allowed us to pwn this time, much to the dislike of our female adversaries) that Eye of Skadi's Frost attack does not stack with Drow's Frost Arrows. DoTA experts out there, is this true? cos' from what i read on DoTA portal, it appears that ranged Eye of Skadi CAN stack, so i'm pretty confused in this department.

The Meaning of Life

Well, it may seem that there's barely anything philosophical about DotA (not unless you consider using Zeus the Lord of Olympia as a way of showing your devotion to a higher power).
Yet if you really look at the entire game play, the metaphysicality of it all, the entire game is one big allegory of life. At the risk of sounding like Deepak Chopra, here's my take on life and DoTA.

Lesson 1: Life is IMBA

Protest made about a particular DotA game being IMBA is akin to the oft heard lamentations about 'life being unfair'. Well, life really isn't fair unfortunately. Life is like an -ar game. we can never choose to the circumstance which we are born into. If you are born into a family where your father and grandfather have a penchant for wearing all white on the 9th of August every year in the Lion City, then congratulations, your life is made. Providence has chosen you to be a powerful hero like Lion. You are destined to be an owner - in game and in life, heroes or prime district properties alike...

However if say you're born in a third world country, and your dad's a former drug dealer serving 3 consecutive life sentences without parole and your mom left you in the care of your feeble grandmother while she eloped with the leader of the local militia, then sorry to say, the programmers of life have dealt you a lousy early game hero like say Abaddon. But that is not to say that you're done for for the rest of the game. It's just that you'll have a harder time farming for gold earlier in the game and metaphorically, earlier on in life. For every leaver there is in a game where they've been dealt with a bad hand, there are those like Roland G Fryer Jr. who turned made good with what they have and went on to gain a BEYOND GODLIKE streak in life.

Lesson 2: Farming - Nothing without labour

Regardless of how powerful or crappy your inherent ultimates are, everyone - Lion, Abaddon or Treeant Protector all have to farm. That is the immutable fact of life and game. Not even Paris Hilton can possibly escape this bounding condition (hey, do u seriously think it's easy clubbing every night and living life pretending as if everyone adores you?). The most talented among us have metaphoric ultimates that allow them to farm really quickly to gain the experience for level ups. But even for the also-rans like me and you, there's the alternative of buildling up the right items that will enhance whatever inherent ultimates providence bestowed upon us - however useless it may seem to be. That for you, is education.

Given the myriad of career choices and similarly items to buy, we are more often than not overwhelmed by the sheer magnitute of decision making to do. The last thing we would like to find ourselves doing is to spend our entire live learning one skill and one job, only to be made obsolete due to industry changes and eventually structurally unemployed late on in life. The DotA equivalent would perhaps be farming for a big-ticket item only to find out that your orb effects do not stack =(

Life and games alike, we need to mug to know what sorta education is suited for us, and what items build up to an Aegis of the Immortal. Of course, there too are the selected few like Richard Branson who went Beyond BEYOND GODLIKE in life even without having much of an education. While it may be true education may not be the only way, but it sure its the safest lower bound for the mere mortals like us. It takes a certain element of skill and experience (and some say luck) to make it big without an education. For most others who mistakenly believe that they have it, they end up like my Pudge who was a little too confident about my hooking ability for my own good.

So for those who are bestowed with talents, the next time you are tempted to procrastinate and log on to Battlenet, just remember: even the nukiest of nukers need to farm for an Aganhim Scepter.

Lesson 3: Life is not just about the frozen throne

The relentless aim to destroy the next tower with the eventual desire to land the coupe de grace to the frozen throne is not unlike the rat race in life. Many of us get so enthralled by the rat race that we often forget what life is about. If only we can just take a step back an enjoy the finer things in life, and in the game. What good is life when you cannot have the capacity to enjoy the fruits of your labour? and What good is a game, if you can destroy the throne yet not get to use that Divine Rapier that you've so painstakingly farmed for to embark on a Beyond Godlike pwning streak?

Lesson 4: Nothing Gold Can Stay

The true beauty of DotA unlike say WoW lies in its finite gameplay. It is an excellent representation of nihilistic nature of life. At the end of the day, there are just that many golden taps that you can install in your toilets, and there are just that many items that you can hold in your inventory. So the next time that you're thinking of buying your third Divine Rapier or adding another Phatom to your 304 strong fleet of Rolls Royces, why not spread the love and buy your struggling team mate the Crystalis which he has been farming for all game or sponsor an underprevillaged kid through college?

In the final reckoning, no matter how much gold you have, someday, the game's gonna end anyway. So why not make it a good game for everyone else?


Learning about life, that's DotA for you!